Asking friends to be your sperm donor – how to do it

Part One of a series: How To Approach Known Donors

Want to ask your Gay Best Friend to be the donor dad of your future kids? It can be challenging territory. Patricia Salem's been through it. Here’s what she wishes she’d known before she started...

There are many things I envisioned about being a gay parent: raising an open-minded sperm donationlittle person; finding a community of queer mums; buying onesies with ironic gay pride slogans. Oh, the fun. What I didn’t count on was becoming a sperm hunter. Like the crocodile hunter, approaching rare and skittish specimens slowly, assessing the probability of them fleeing, closing in and smiling while gripping (metaphorically) on to them for dear life, cooing ‘what a beaut! Calm down, I’m not gonna scare ya!’

Unlike the crocodile hunter, no actual men were hurt when we tentatively approached friends to ask them about becoming a known sperm donor. But feelings were: mostly mine and my partner’s...


To read the rest of the article, with pointers on what to consider, managing expectations and more, buy issue 8 of We Are Family magazine here
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